Rise and shine, pleasure seekers!
Sarah Douglass here, the editor-in-chief of PSYN Media. Some exciting news… The JoyToy™ officially goes on sale this Monday on pussynomics.com. I want to personally thank you for your support during this launch — it’s been a longtime cumming! Stay joyful & vibrating. xx.
This morning we’re waking up with Lauren Tetenbaum, LCSW, JD, PMH-C — a therapist, women’s rights advocate, and writer dedicated to helping women navigate life’s biggest transitions. With a background as both a lawyer and a psychotherapist, Lauren specializes in supporting women through identity shifts tied to motherhood, career, and reproductive health. She’s also the author of Millennial Menopause: Preparing for Perimenopause, Menopause, and Life’s Next Period — a guide to embracing the next chapter with confidence and compassion. Let’s dive in…
What’s your earliest memory of pleasure—sexual or otherwise?
I’ll always remember reading Forever by Judy Blume at summer camp at age 12. I learned about the pleasures of sex, first love, and laughing and learning with girlfriends!
Right now, what’s turning you on—culturally, creatively, or sexually?
I’m turned on by the advocacy I’m seeing my medical colleagues engage in regarding menopause, maternal mental health, and other forms of reproductive healthcare. They are using their brilliant voices to dispel misinformation and ensure women are educated and empowered through social media, books, podcasts, newsletters, and more. They are superheroes!
Do you have a ritual, tool, or practice that helps you connect to your own pleasure?
I find pleasure in feeling confident. That can show up for me in so many settings, whether it’s catching up with friends, giving a presentation, connecting with women at a networking event, surviving the chaos of the morning with my kids, or wearing an outfit I feel great in while spending time with my husband (who definitely doesn’t care what I’m wearing and always tells me I’m beautiful in my old sweats – guys, take note!). I love finding pleasure in small moments and celebrating all forms of pleasure.
What do you wish people talked about more openly when it comes to sex & pleasure?
I wish people talked more about the mental load of motherhood and its potential impact on libido. So many of my psychotherapy clients feel like they are the only ones experiencing changes to desire, body image, or intimacy – and they certainly aren’t! It’s empowering to talk about these issues not only to feel less isolated but also to make change. When women are able to advocate for themselves and get what they want – in both the bedroom and the home itself when it comes to domestic and caregiving work – it’s very sexy!
If we peeked at your “pleasure playlist,” what’s on it?
“Dress” by Taylor Swift, which admittedly has been on repeat for me since watching The Summer I Turned Pretty finale. What a perfect, sexy song for a perfect, sexy moment!
What’s one myth or misconception about pleasure you’d love to debunk?
Women tend to internalize messages about changes to sex drive or their bodies, that “this is just life now.” But life is what you make of it. You may be a tired mom of young kids or a woman navigating perimenopause symptoms (or both!), but you can still be a very sexual person if you want to be.
If this is something you are struggling with, try to approach it with lightheartedness and remember small steps can lead to big change. Carve out some alone time, spice it up with a partner in a new location or position, and certainly get help if anything is hurting or uncomfortable!
What’s one lesson you’ve learned on your pleasure journey that you’d want others to know?
While doing research for my book, Millennial Menopause: Preparing for Perimenopause, Menopause, and Life’s Next Period, I learned that there are so many tools (like medications, therapies, behavioral strategies) for enhancing women’s sexuality at midlife that we don’t talk about enough because as a culture, we don’t tend to value women’s pleasure or bodily autonomy. Well, I do value these things! If you’re not experiencing the pleasure you want and deserve - and I mean sexually or otherwise - don’t settle. Support is available!
✨ Lauren Tetenbaum’s Plug
Feeling the shift? Learn more about Lauren’s practice at thecounselaur.com and dive into her new book, Millennial Menopause: Preparing for Perimenopause, Menopause, and Life’s Next Period (millennialmenopause.com) — a smart, supportive roadmap for navigating hormonal changes, identity, and everything in between.